Assessing Your Safety

Does the abuser change just before becoming violent?

	• Look in eyes change
	• Posture changes (fists clenched, etc.)
	• Voice changes
	• Face changes (expression/colour)
	• Threatens verbally or non-verbally before striking you

Does your behaviour change before violence?

	• Do you have physical responses to fear you may feel before an attack(stomach pains, headache, tight feeling in your chest)
	• Do you feel more anxious

What circumstances usually exist before you are abused?


	• Alcohol/Drugs
	• Lack of money
	• Pay day
	• Day of Week
	• Time of Year
	• Are certain people around
	• Are certain people not around
	• Were you in your home or outside
	• Birthdays
	• Anniversaries
	• Holidays
	• Sports events

Other things to consider when assessing your situation

	• The abuser expresses fantasies or threats of homicide or suicide
	• Pending or actual separation
	• Pending or actual serving of court orders (divorce papers, restraining orders, etc)
	• A new relationship
	• Other dates or events that remind the abuser of diminished control
	• Pregnancy
	• Children in your home
	• Threats of, or actual, child abuse; child(ren) witnessing violence
	• Prior use of, access to or possession of weapons (guns, knives, ropes, martial arts, etc)
	• Military or paramilitary (police) training
	• Being isolated by where you live, your culture, your race, your religion, your disability, etc.
	• Isolation of abuser
	• Obsessiveness about you or family
	• Possessiveness and control of you
	• Extent and escalation of prior violence
	• Threats of violence to you
	• Previous police intervention
	• Known violence with others
	• Ignoring or violating court orders
	• Pet abuse